The client update went out an hour ago and nobody has said a word. A line you can borrow: "I finished the client update. What is one thing I should keep doing and one thing I should change next time?" It names the work, asks for two small things and points toward next time, which makes it easy to answer in a few seconds.
A "good job" is nice to hear, but it is not always something you can act on. A specific question usually gets you something you can use.
Below you will find wording for a manager, a peer and a customer, an email you can copy, what to do with the answer, what to try when the answer is vague or never comes, and how to ask after a job interview.
- Name the work Say which update, shift or draft you mean.
- Ask one or two things Clarity or timing is easier to answer than "how am I doing?"
- Ask people who saw it A peer, a manager or a customer sees different things.
- Choose one action Pick one thing to try from what you hear.
- Follow up Tell them what you tried and ask if it is closer.
Ask a smaller question
A narrow request is easier to answer than a big one. "How am I doing?" asks someone to sum up weeks of work, while "Was yesterday's handoff easy to follow?" takes seconds. Name the work (the client presentation, yesterday's shift), pick one or two things such as clarity or timing, and ask for one example. Career advice from Yale School of Management suggests asking a forward-looking question, which could be as simple as "What would you try next time?"
Timing helps too. Right after a project, a presentation, a shift or a one-to-one, the work is still fresh. Offer a choice to take the pressure off: "Could I ask you two questions now, or is another time better?"
Asking for advice rather than a verdict tends to land well. "How would you approach this next time?" invites a colleague to share what they know. Workplace research that compared asking for advice with asking someone to take a problem off your hands found that colleagues tended to rate people who sought advice as more capable. That may not hold in every workplace.
A review of feedback-seeking research describes both benefits and costs of asking, which is why a specific, well-timed request helps. Asking will not promise a raise or a promotion, and some managers give little feedback, which is not your fault. Giving feedback to a colleague is a different skill with its own wording.
Three kinds of answer you can ask for
When someone says "feedback," they could mean three different things. Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen describe appreciation, coaching and evaluation as the three kinds. Appreciation tells you what to keep doing, coaching tells you what to change, and evaluation tells you where you stand against what was expected.
That matters because a compliment does not answer a performance question, and a rating rarely comes with detailed coaching. Pick the kind you actually need and say so.
| What you need | Question shape | Example | What you get |
|---|---|---|---|
| What you needAppreciation | Question shape"What worked well?" | Example"Which part of the presentation was clearest?" | What you getStrengths to repeat |
| What you needCoaching | Question shape"What should I change?" | Example"What would you do differently in the next update?" | What you getA possible adjustment |
| What you needEvaluation | Question shape"How am I performing against expectations?" | Example"Am I meeting the agreed standard for response time?" | What you getWhere you stand against a stated expectation |
| What you needClarification | Question shape"Can you give an example?" | Example"Which handoff was unclear?" | What you getA concrete situation |
| What you needFollow-up | Question shape"What should I try next?" | Example"What is one action you want me to test?" | What you getA manageable next step |
Words to use with a manager, a peer or a customer
Ask each person about what they actually saw. A manager can speak to priorities and expectations. A peer who received your handoff knows whether it worked for them. A customer can tell you about service and clarity, though not about another employee. Borrow these lines and bend them to your own way of talking.
| Who you ask | In person | Chat | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Who you askManager | In person"I've finished the client update. What is one thing I should keep doing and one thing I should change next time?" | Email"Could you share one strength and one improvement point from the update?" | Chat"Quick question on the update: what is one thing you'd change for next time?" |
| Who you askPeer | In person"You saw the handoff. Was anything unclear or harder to use than it needed to be?" | Email"Could you tell me whether the handoff gave you what you needed?" | Chat"Did the handoff work for you? Anything I should change?" |
| Who you askCustomer or client | In person"Was any part of the process confusing or less useful?" | Email"Could you share one thing that worked well and one thing we could improve?" | Chat"Before I close this out, was there anything we could have made easier?" |
Your situation changes the wording, and that is fine. With two minutes before your next task, try "On today's handoff, was the key information easy to find? What should I change tomorrow?" If you work remotely, "A reply with one keep and one change is enough" costs the other person almost nothing, and it costs you nothing either. A busy manager may prefer a choice: "Would you prefer a two-question email or a five-minute conversation?"
If you are getting ready for a formal review, the performance review self-assessment page can help you organize what you want to say. When you ask customers for comments, follow your workplace's own policy on surveys.
An email you can copy
Some work is easier to comment on in writing. Keep the email short enough to answer from a phone, and paste this one as a start.
Subject: Feedback on [project or task]
>
Hi [Name],
>
Thank you for your help with [project or task]. I would appreciate brief feedback on my work, particularly [specific area]. Could you share one thing that worked well, one thing I could improve next time, and one action you would recommend I try on the next [project, presentation, or shift]?
>
If it is easier, I would be glad to discuss this for 10 minutes at [two possible times]. A short reply is also helpful.
>
Thank you,
[Name]
The line "A short reply is also helpful" tells the person they do not owe you an essay. For quick follow-ups, skip the template. After a project, try "Thanks for your input on the project. When you have a moment, what is one thing I should repeat and one thing I should change on the next project?"
After a presentation, "Could you give me one note on clarity and pacing? I would like to apply it to the next one" keeps it specific. After a shift, "Was there anything about my handoff that I should handle differently next shift?" fits a quick chat at the door.
What to do with the answer
Start with "Thank you for telling me." Then listen before you explain. It is natural to want to defend the work, but you will learn more if you ask a question first, such as "Can you give me a specific example?" or "What would you have liked me to do instead?"
Next, decide what is useful and within your control. Not every comment needs action, and you can judge what you hear without treating it as a verdict on you as a person. Then choose one thing, such as "I am going to try the shorter format on the next update." After you have tried it, close the loop with "I tried that this week. Is it closer to what you meant?"
Thank them
"Thank you for telling me." Appreciate the time, even if the answer stings a little.
Listen first
Hold your explanation until they have finished.
Ask for an example
"Can you give me a specific example?"
Decide what is useful
Keep what is relevant and within your control.
Choose one action
"I'm going to try the shorter format on the next update."
Follow up
"I tried that this week. Is it closer to what you meant?"
If one answer points to something you want to work on over time, the professional development plan page has a worksheet for turning it into steps, and professional development goals can help you turn the action you chose into a goal.
1. Which request is easier for a busy person to answer?
2. When is a good time to ask about a project or a shift?
3. Your manager says your update "needs work." What helps most?
4. You were turned down for a job and want a suggestion. What fits?
When the answer is vague, unfair or never comes
A vague answer such as "It was fine, just needs polish" is a chance to narrow things down. Try "Could you point to one moment that shows the concern and tell me what you would have preferred?" Or give a short menu: "Was it the content, the timing, the tone or the format?"
If a comment feels unfair, pause before you answer. Then ask for the specific example, and calmly add any context they may not have: "I want to take this seriously. Could we look at the specific incidents and the standard I was expected to meet?" Written project goals or your role description can show what was expected, and notes about your important work can help later. If it stays unclear, a manager's manager, HR or another workplace channel may be a fitting next stop. If anything involves harassment, discrimination, retaliation, threats or safety, use your workplace's reporting process promptly, and take legal questions to a qualified adviser.
Silence is common, especially from busy managers, and it is not automatically your fault. Try a narrower question at a real checkpoint, or offer an easy format: "Could you reply with one keep and one change?" You can also ask someone else who saw the work, or ask what success looks like before the next task. Asking again and again does not oblige anyone to give detail.
With no one to ask and no money for a course, you still have information. Your written project goals, customer results and a colleague who reviews similar work can all tell you how the work is landing.
Asking for feedback after a job interview
Asking after an interview is reasonable, and a short, kind request is the way to do it. The best time is after a rejection or once the employer says the process is finished. If you are still waiting, ask about the timeline first, since silence does not mean the interview went badly.
After a rejection, a message like this is enough:
Subject: Thank you for the interview
>
Hi [Name],
>
Thank you for letting me know and for the opportunity to interview for [role]. I appreciated learning more about [specific aspect of the role or organization].
>
If you are able to share one area I could improve in future interviews, I would be grateful. Even a brief suggestion would be useful.
>
Thank you again for your time,
[Name]
If the date they gave you has passed, one line can do it: "You mentioned I might hear an update by [date], so I wanted to ask whether there is any news. If the position has been filled, and if your policy allows, I would appreciate one brief suggestion about my interview." The University of Florida career page has more sample wording.
Keep your expectations realistic. Some employers do not give individual feedback, or they give a general answer. One reply is limited information, and a request will not reopen the application. After one or two polite tries, move on and practice with a career counselor, a mentor or a mock interview.
A small thing to try this week
Pick one piece of work from the last week or two, such as an update, a handoff or a shift. Choose one person who actually saw it, then say or send a two-part question: "What is one thing I should keep, and one thing I should change next time?" When the answer comes, plan one small thing to try and tell them what you tried. If your week is packed, the five-word version works in chat: "Anything I should change next time?"
You may get a short answer or none at all. Asking again later, or asking someone else who saw the work, is fine. More ideas on growing at work live in the Career Growth section.
If you have a workplace question you would like Motivation Facts to cover, you can tell us through the contact page. For now, jot down your two-part question tonight so it is ready the next time a piece of work wraps up.
Questions people ask
Short answers to six common questions.
How do you professionally ask for feedback?
Name the specific work, ask one or two focused questions, and give the person an easy way to answer. "Could I ask you two questions about the presentation, now or at another time?" works in most workplaces.
What is a good sentence for asking for feedback?
"What is one thing I should keep doing and one thing I should change next time?" is a good all-purpose sentence. You can swap in the name of the project or shift. Another way to say it is "Do you have a note for me on the handoff?"
How do I ask for feedback without sounding needy or desperate?
Ask about something specific and ask once, near the work itself. A request tied to a task sounds like someone who cares about doing it well. If the answer is short, thank them and let it be.
Should I ask for feedback by email or in person?
It depends on the workplace and on the other person's time. Email suits a detailed or written piece of work, and a quick chat suits a small question. You can offer a choice, such as "Would you rather I send two questions by email, or grab five minutes?" because there is no single rule that works everywhere.
Can I ask for feedback after a job interview?
Yes, politely, and usually after the process is complete. Some employers do not give individual feedback, so a short request that says you understand fits well.
What should I say to my boss if I want to know how I am doing?
Pair a look ahead with a specific piece of work: "On the client update, what would you want me to do differently on the next one?" That gives your boss something concrete to answer. It also keeps the conversation about the work and what to try next.
Feedback. Information from another person about how your work or actions landed.
Appreciation. Feedback that tells you what you did well and should keep doing.
Coaching. Feedback that suggests what to change or try next time.
Evaluation. Feedback that tells you where you stand against an expected standard.
Handoff. The moment you pass work, tasks or information to a coworker or the next shift.
One-to-one. A regular private meeting between you and your manager.
Follow-up. A short message after you try a suggestion, to say what you did and ask if it helped.
Sources
- Annual Review of Organizational Psychology and Organizational Behavior, feedback-seeking review
- Liu et al., Personnel Psychology, on advice-seeking at work
- Stone and Heen, Thanks for the Feedback, book excerpt
- Yale School of Management career guidance on asking your manager
- University of Florida career guidance on feedback after an interview
- Saint Mary's University career services on asking in your first 90 days
- Binghamton University guidance on requesting feedback after a rejection
- University of Washington Bothell guidance on interview follow-up
